Posted in Music

Friday Playlist

Making a playlist. These songs are stuck in my head so they are first…

Lord Huron- The Night We Met

Lord Huron- She Lit A Fire

Harry Styles- Sign of the Times

The XX- On Hold

Paper Kites- Willowtree March

I’ll figure out the rest as the day goes…

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Posted in Quote

Ferlinghetti–

 “Poetry is eternal graffiti written in the heart of everyone.” – Lawrence Ferlinghetti

Love this quote. It’s breathtaking to think something such as your words to another would leave such an everlasting mark on their heart. I like to think once you read a poem part of it is stuck on your heart forever, and stays within you. Kinda the same.

Posted in Poetry

Imperfections

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Imperfections.
LC ©2017

She will make you feel
inadequate like you don’t
belong. Looking down–
watching and waiting
for another beautiful
quirk to show itself.
Perfection doesn’t
make mistakes.  Or have your flaws.
She is your better.
Or maybe you are
the issue like “he” has said.
Because that’s not her.

{I’m the idiot
then for how she makes me feel.
I can control it.}

My sister-in-law often has the power to make me feel this way. My husband says she isn’t like that, but I think woman have a special intuition about other woman. I think men are clueless in our ways.

*Revised to fix flow of poem and word choice.

 

Posted in Quote

Graves—

“A perfect poem is impossible. Once it had been written, the world would end.”

Robert Graves

I found this quote today trying to stir up some inspiration to write. This is a beautiful quote about poetry. Graves quote is accurate. If a person wrote a perfect– by the world’s standards–  poem, the world would end. Why? Because everyone in the world would feel every emotion in it.
Posted in Poetry

Carefree, Happy Hearts

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Carefree, Happy Hearts.
LC © 2017

She closes her eyes
feeling the breeze on her face.
Places both hands on
her door, happily. She smiles
carefree. Like nothing matters.
Maybe it doesn’t.
It’s a sunny day.
The windows are down.
Our family is together–
that is all we need.

My daughter inspired this poem! Turned around and instantly started smiling. Occasionally, I still place my head out of the window feeling the air on my face. I enjoy feeling the breeze through my hair and closing my eyes with the sun warm on my face. She reminded me I need to do it more often. Instead of being caught up with “adulting.”

 

 

Posted in Blogging, Life

How I Spent the Winter

It may seem as though I abandoned my blog. It does look that way. Though appearances are often deceiving

As much as I wanted to write, I had a series of catastrophes to deal with. First, my failing marriage– no surprise there. Second, health issues and testing– stalemate. Third, my children (my teenager and his issues) — home-school.

Situations aren’t as bad as they look on computer screen. With many prayers and compromises from both parties, my marriage is improving. Health issues are.. meh. It seems my situation stays same, which is disheartening. I am hoping my last specialist appointment will help uncover part of the mystery. And home-school.. I know! Wow!

So why did I decide on home-school?

Having a teenager is the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life! They are so hard. I feel bad for EVERYTHING I put my mother through!!

My son isn’t a troublemaker. He wasn’t expelled. The school wasn’t helping him. They were holding him back in some ways, and he was falling behind in others. Our decision was based on the school and partly due to the crowd he was hanging out with. He never fell behind before. He always made the honor roll.

My daughter experienced some trouble in elementary school. It seemed beneficial to look for alternatives. I  did a ton of research for online schools vs. traditional homeschooling, and found an exceptional online school. After a month of deciding, as it wasn’t a decision made lightly, they were enrolled. We needed something different!

Starting school at home was not without its challenges. We had to adapt to a routine. However, they are doing excellent. I am proud of them. Although it does consume my time, I love how rewarding it is to watch them grow and learn.

Over the winter, I went through a major depression. I didn’t feel like doing anything aside from my normal routine, and hanging out with family. Family was great. Forget going outside. Seeing anyone. Talking to anyone. Writing anything. Why write anything? It’s going to sound dumb.

Anything I loved doing– I didn’t have the energy or willpower to do.

I hated how I looked in the mirror. I hated my reflection. Eat. Don’t eat. Sleep. Can’t sleep. Hurt. Hurt. Hurt. 

Depression is awful. It makes you think things that aren’t true. Feel things you shouldn’t feel. What am I supposed to remember again? Crap! Grumble. Grumble. Grumble. 

I didn’t have any thoughts of suicide, but some who battle depression do. If you have depression and have these thoughts please talk to someone– a counselor or the suicide hotline–  1-800-273-8255

More than 300 million people of all ages suffer from depression. So if you are one of the ones who suffer like I do, you are not alone. May is Mental Health Awareness month!

Posted in Poetry

Wasted Energy

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Wasted Energy.
LC. © 2017

Depression is a
dark cloud over my head, lurking.
Like I created
my own personal
monsoon. If only I had
energy to blast
the rain from capturing my
soul- a rainbow would
appear in the sky.

Posted in Poetry

Don’t Change

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People cannot change.
We  try controlling
our own destiny.
But when fate comes knocking–
She plays tricks on relationships.
‘Causes collateral damage.
People try morphing
into who they aren’t meant to be
to placate others
for happiness and harmony.
It lasts for a while
until it fades away–
because people do not change.
Do they?

©2017 LC

Posted in Poetry

Love is War

Love is War.
LC ©2016

Love is war–
words that sting.
And fights damage,
your heart and soul.
It is like surgery–
gathering torn shreds
of broken shrapnel.
Fixing the mess
lying before you.
As the blood seeps,
through gory fingers.
Refusing to skip
a beat– BOOM-BOOM!
Yes, you will love, again.

Posted in Poetry

A Caged Bird

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A Caged Bird.
LC © 2016

Do not marry him–
for he will crush your spirit,
and break your soul’s wings.
A colorful bird in a
cage with no song left to sing.
And no wings to soar.
You were made for better things.
Go! They wait for you.